What is Sex Therapy? What is NOT Sex Therapy?
Sex therapy can feel like a bit of a mystery to many people. I often find that when someone hears the term or begins to search for a sex therapist in Denver, their mind jumps to very different places—some imagine a hyper-clinical, intimidating environment, while others conjure up something more risqué or even intrusive.
Neither of these images really captures what sex therapy is about. So, let’s clear up some of the confusion by exploring what sex therapy is, and maybe more importantly, what it isn’t.
What Sex Therapy Is
At its heart, sex therapy is talk therapy. It’s a space where individuals or couples can explore their thoughts, feelings, and challenges related to sex and intimacy in a safe, non-judgmental environment. Like any form of therapy, it’s about emotional well-being, mental health, and helping you develop a deeper understanding of yourself and your relationships. Specifically, I help cultivate a space for you to do more self-exploration around your sexual self and pleasure. Sometimes that includes being sexual with someone, by yourself, or helping support exploration around understanding your asexuality.
People come to sex therapy for a range of reasons. It could be to address issues like desire discrepancies in a relationship, developing sexual communication skills, difficulties with arousal or orgasm, challenges around sexual identity, orientation, or attraction or even trauma related to past experiences. Folks just come to learn and explore about pleasure! Whatever the concern or hope, the goal is to help you build a healthier, more fulfilling relationship with your sexuality—whether that means improving communication, learning new ways of thinking about intimacy, or addressing deeper emotional barriers that might be getting in the way.
Sex therapy is for everyone. It doesn’t matter if you’re single, partnered, queer, straight, cis, trans, asexual, or somewhere else along the spectrum—your experiences and sexual health matter. . I believe sex therapy should be an affirming, inclusive space where you can feel safe discussing your unique needs and desires, without fear of judgment.
What Sex Therapy Isn’t
Let me be clear about what sex therapy is not. First, it is not about someone physically guiding or instructing you on how to have sex. There are no demonstrations, no physical touch between therapist and client, and absolutely no pressure to engage in any kind of sexual activity. Sex therapy is about understanding and processing emotions, thoughts, and behaviors surrounding sex, not about engaging in sex itself within the therapy space.
Sex therapy is also not about enforcing a specific idea of what sex should look like. It’s not about saying, “this is the right way to be sexual,” or “this is what a normal sexual relationship looks like.” If anything, it’s quite the opposite. I’m here to help you figure out what you want from your sexual experiences and relationship(s). It’s about your comfort, your desires, and your boundaries—not anyone else’s expectations.
Finally, sex therapy isn’t just for people in crisis. You don’t need to be experiencing severe problems to benefit from it. You might just want a space to talk openly about your sexuality, work on enhancing sexual satisfaction in a relationship, or explore feelings that are new or confusing. Sometimes it’s about improving something that’s already good, or simply finding peace with where you’re at.
How Sex Therapy Can Help
Sexuality is such a core part of who we are, but it’s often surrounded by layers of shame, stigma, or misinformation. Many of us weren’t taught how to talk about sex in healthy, open ways, and that can lead to feelings of isolation or confusion when things aren’t going the way we expect. Sex therapy gives you a space to explore those feelings with compassion and can be a helpful space to learn sex-positive related education.
If you’ve been experiencing challenges—whether in your relationship or within yourself—sex therapy can offer a path forward. It’s not about quick fixes or learning tricks to improve performance; it’s about understanding the emotional and psychological aspects of intimacy and figuring out what feels right for you. We work together, at your pace, to identify what might be blocking you from having the kind of intimate life you desire.
Whether it’s unpacking trauma, addressing concerns about desire, or simply helping you and your partner communicate more openly, sex therapy can be a powerful tool for growth. It’s also a reminder that you are not broken, and there’s no “right” way to experience intimacy. Your journey is uniquely yours, and it deserves to be approached with care and empathy.
What to Expect in Sex Therapy
In a typical sex therapy session, you can expect a lot of talking, listening, and reflection. We might discuss how your upbringing shaped your views on sex, how past relationships have influenced your current situation, or how you communicate your needs with a partner. I will create a space for you to be curious about your sexual self that feels safe, inviting, and non-judgmental. We may also work on practical skills, like ways to increase intimacy and connection with yourself or your partner, or how to navigate differences in desire.
Most importantly, there’s no rush and no pressure. We’ll go at a pace that feels comfortable for you. The goal is to create a space where you can open up about things you may never have felt safe talking about before—and where you feel truly heard and understood.
Sex therapy is a space for healing, growth, and self-discovery. It’s not about fixing you, because you’re not broken. Instead, it’s about helping you understand yourself and your relationships in deeper, more fulfilling ways. Whether you’re grappling with specific sexual concerns or just looking to explore your intimacy in a more mindful way, sex therapy can offer support, guidance, and most of all, validation.
Your experiences, feelings, and desires matter to me.
If you are searching for a Denver sex therapist who is committed to creating a safe space where you feel heard, I invite you to Book a Session with me.